Appointments

This week I've had a couple of appointments, but then that's nothing new! On Monday I went to the dentist with the kids. Just a normal thing to do. Except it's not when you've got a Hickman line. Before having any dental work done I have to take a certain antibiotic because if any bugs from my mouth get into my line it's going to cause a line infection. 

About 6/7 months ago I was going to visit the dentist (it must have been ok one of the rare occasions I wasn't in hospital in 2013!) and remembered that I needed the antibiotics. So I rang St Marks, found out what antibiotic I needed and then rang the dental practice to get the dentist to prescribe it. 

But no, he wasn't allowed to. 

So I rang my GP and asked him to prescribe it. 

But no, he wasn't allowed to. 

So I rang St Marks. They told me that I shouldn't have any treatment done without it and they couple write me a prescription but I would have to go down there to get it. Because I wasn't having any toothache or problems I decided not to bother and ended up just letting the dentist look at my teeth. What a bloody palaver!

So this time when I sat in the chair and he asked if I had taken my antibiotics I could have kicked myself. I hadn't even thought about it. So again, he just had to have a poke about and luckily there's nothing wrong or hurting. Becasue I haven't had my teeth cleaned for ages he prescribed me some mouthwashwhich should also help my gums, which can get a bit sore.

So the trip was fine for me but my poor Big Fella had to have a tooth pulled out. It had been wobbly for ages but he hadn't complained about it hurting or anything. On the Sunday night I asked to have a look before going to the dentist and couldn't believe it. 

When I asked him if it hurt he just shrugged his shoulders all nonchanantly and said "  just a bit". If that was me I would have been screaming blue murder! The tooth fairy was extra generous that night!

I also visited a spinal surgeon on Monday. Why? Well let me tell you. You know my numb leg? Well, when they did an MRI on a few weeks ago I got a call from my GP telling me that they had seen something on the scan and that I needed to see her the next day. Panicking, I went in to be told that it looked like there was a mass in my spinal cord which they thought was a cyst, or known in medical circles as Syringomyelia. The GP was quite concerned and told me that I should go straight to A&E so that it could be looked at.

Bloody Hell. Now I was really stressing. I rang Hubby and he left work straight away to come with me. We spent 6 hours in A&E and when we saw the Doctor she said that the MRI was only of the base of my spine and that they would need to do a full MRI scan tgo determine the extent of the cysts. She referred me to a spinal surgeon at Princess Alexandra hospital and I waited for a date for the scan.

In the meantime, although advised against it by my GP, I googled Syringomyelia. Well, I wish I hadn't. I started to worry that if the cysts were extensive then I would be paralysed within 10 years or require more spinal surgery (I had 2 spinal operations as a teenager because I had 2 fractured vertabrae- you couldn't make my life up could you??!) I didn't blog about this at the time because I didn't want to worry people before I knew for sure what was wrong. Plus I was struggling to get my head around it and if I didn't think about it (or write about it) then maybe it wasn't really happening. 

I had the MRI scan and that was fine. I'm not claustrophobic so having them doesn't really bother me. The computer crashed just before I was due to go in so I had to wait for them to reboot it. It took nearly 90 mins so I sat reading Take a Break (there's always someone whose life is crapper than yours in that mag!) I was having it with contrast (dye in the blood) so they needed to put a cannula in me. They had a bit of trouble with my dodgy veins but got one in eventually. The scan took about an hour and I fell asleep for the first half. Because I have a silver bangle that Hubby gave me for our wedding that I literally cannot get off I have to lie in the tunnel with me arm above my head. It was ok until they started to scan the top half of my spine and my neck when it started to vibrate and heat up. It was really uncomfortable so I didn't get any more sleep after that.

I was understandably nervous about the appointment on Monday. Would it be more bad news? It didn't help that Hubby and I had fallen out on Sunday night and we weren't talking. To give him credit, he did try to come with me to the hospital but me being as stubborn as I am gave him the "I don't need you to come with me. I'm quite capable of going to the hospital on my own. I don't want you to feel like you have to care, just because I'm off to see the surgeon" etc, etc. When actually I just wanted him there with me to hold my hand and tell me everything would be ok. Will I ever learn?

I saw the surgeon at St Margarets hospital in Epping. I had never been there before and so it's another hospital to add to my list! It was quite easy to get to, had plenty of parking and easy to get around so not too bad. The clinic was running late (as they always do) so when I was finally called in I had been waiting for over an hour.

The doctor reviewed the MRI scans and we had quite an extensive discussion about them. He also did a full neurological assessment so a lot of pulling and pushing of arms, legs, fingers etc. He wanted to discuss my case with his senior and left me alone in the room. With my scan on the screen. Of course I had to take a picture of it! It is cropped though to maintain my privacy!

So the outcome was that yes, I do have a cyst in my spinal cord. It is in the area that links to the legs which is why my leg is numb. It's not big enough to drain, and that would carry a lot of risks so I was quite pleased about that, nor would it require operating on. He thinks it may have been there since my surgery 15 years ago (but he doesn't really know) and that the epidural I had in March has triggered it off. It might get bigger and get worse, or it may (fingers crossed) get a bit better. So it looks like I'm stuck with my numb leg, and that I will need to use a stick when I'm having a bad day. Luckily it's my left leg and I drive an automatic so I can still get out and about. So while most people would be gutted to have a spinal cyst, I was just pleased that it wasn't as bad as I had feared.

You'd think that would be enough excitment for one week, but no, I went and picked up my new glasses. What do you think?

That picture was taken of me at work. At work? I know. Shock horror! I went into work to see my boss and sort out about returning and my annual leave. I was very nervous about going in and seeing everyone because some of my team I hadn't seen in nearly a year! I was really worried about what to wear...don't want to look too nice and then people think there's nothing wrong with you, but then you don't want to look like a scruff either. I was worried that people would be secretly judging me- is she really as ill as she makes out? Why isn't she back at work yet? All these things and loads more were going through my head. It's silly, I know that, but I can't help it. I think that is one of the good things about this blog. My team read it and know what I'm going through or have been through and therefore know that I'm not skiving or treating this time off work like an extended holiday!

I had a long conversation with my boss and she has reassured me that when I go back (at the beginning of September) I will have a phased return plan and won't be expected to work all day, every day to begin with. I think it's going to be a big shock to the system but also a really positive step to getting back to 'normal'.

So it's been a busy week. And this weekend has no let up either. I dropped Big Girl off at Cub camp tonight, Big Fella has a football tournament tomorrow and then I'm taking Big Girl and her friend to see a certain boyband on Sunday night. I think Monday will be spent in bed, hooked up to my IV fluids, recovering! But do you know what? It's great that I am well enough to do these things with them. I'm so pleased that I can do some normal Mum things with the kids and when the sun shines like it did today it makes me so excited about the 6 weeks holiday. I will make sure that these summer holidays are filled with fun and memory moments becasue last summer was pretty crap. But that was that and I won't dwell on it. I'm getting better. I'm having more good days than bad. And I'm looking to the future. Because I'm sure it can only get better!

NB x