Top and Tail

Yesterday I was lucky enough to have not one, but two cameras poked and pushed into various bodily orifices. I thought I would explain a little bit more about the tests and procedures so you know what I had done and incase you ever have the pleasure of having these done yourself.

The doctors had ordered two tests to be done- a gastroscopy and a flexible sigmoidoscopy. These should hopefully identify a cause of the pain I've been getting in my stomach and rectum and allows the doctors to check that everything is healing ok internally. 

In order to have these tests I wasn't allowed to eat from midnight and was completely nil by mouth (so no drinks) from 7am yesterday. I knew I was going to be on the afternoon list and had hoped I would go down early. No such luck. In fact I was the last patient of the day at 5pm. 

I was taken down from the ward on my bed wearing one of the super sexy NHS gowns but luckily no stockings. Some patients require an enema prior to the tail end test but they didn't want to give me one and risk upsetting my new pouch so I managed to dodge that bullet so to speak. 

The Wolfson Unit of Endoscopy at St Marks was purpose built in 1996 as a national centre for endoscopy. In 2007 it was recognised as a world centre of excellence by the World Organisation of Gastrointestinal Endoscopy; the only centre in the UK to be recognised in this way so I knew I was in safe hands. 

They take you on the bed into a little room, not much bigger than a double bedroom, where they carry out the procedures. I was asked if I wanted any sedation- er, hell yeah! Who would say no?

They gave me a small amount of sedative through a cannula in my hand but I didn't really notice the effect to be honest. Luckily I had not long had some IV paracetamol on the ward so I think that helped with pain relief. 

The doctor consented me, explaining what he was going to do and the risks involved. The first test was the Gastroscopy (also know as an endoscopy). This is a test where an endoscope is used to look at the upper part of your gut- the oesophagus, stomach and duodenum. 

The endoscope is a thin, flexible telescope about as thick as your little finger. The tip contains a light and a camera so that they can see your insides. It also has a little grabber so that biopsy samples can be taken if necessary. Info from http://www.patient.co.uk/health/gastroscopy-endoscopy

The doctor then sprayed a numbing throat spray into the back of my mouth and down my throat. It didn't taste too pleasant but it did the job. It felt a bit like when you go the dentist and they numb part of your mouth for a filling or whatever. 

I then had a plastic, circular mouthpiece inserted into my mouth that I had to bite down onto. It was held in place by a strap going round the back of my head. I was told that when the camera hit the back of my throat I would gag but that I should try to swallow and breathe calmly through my nose. Ok. Didn't sound too hard. 

What I hadn't banked on was the fact that the gag reflex was so strong and that the doctor wouldn't stop pushing. So I was gagging, he was pushing and the nurse was suctioning the sick and bile coming up. Nice. Once it was down and in the stomach it was ok and didn't stay there for too long, probably only a few minutes, although in reality it felt like a lot longer! This is done with you laying on your side on the bed, not sitting up as I thought it would be done. 

After he had done what he needed to do he pulled it out quite quickly and then it was all over. The mouth piece was removed and I could breathe normally. Because I had chosen to be sedated they give you oxygen through little tubes in your nose so you don't feel like you are suffocating or going to die or anything while the tube is in your throat. 

The next procedure was the flexible sigmoidoscopy. This was for them to look at my back passage and my newly formed pouch to see how it was healing and if there was any reason why I'm experiencing the horrible crampy spasms and pain. 

For this I had to stay lying on my side and pull my knees up to my chest to make it easier to insert the scope into my bottom. First they put lubricant around your bottom and have a feel with a finger and then the scope gets put in. 

Again it's a long, flexible tube about the width of a little finger with a light and camera on the end. 

This time I was facing the TV screen that the images are relayed to so I could actually see what the Doctor was looking at. Some people might find it a bit gross or disgusting but I find it absolutely fascinating to be able to see my insides. 

It is a bit uncomfortable when the scope first gets inserted and when they move it round the bends of your bowel but it's not painful. The doctor was very careful as be didn't want to damage my new pouch or "Surgeon A might kill me!" he said. 

After a few minutes this procedure was done and dusted, the scope pulled out and your bottom wiped to get rid of the lubricating jelly and anything else that may have leaked out. 

I was then taken to the recovery area to have my observations- blood pressure, temperature etc- checked before being taken back to the ward. 

I felt a little bit sore in my bottom and my throat felt a bit tender but that didn't stop me from eating an egg sandwich and a packet of crisps! 

Although at the time the sedative didn't seem to make a huge amount of difference I did feel quite tired after the procedure which I don't know is as a result of being sedated or not having slept very well the night before (or a bit if both). I ended up falling asleep about 8pm so I must have been tired. 

I was woken by the night nurses about 10pm to be given medication, antibiotics into my Hickman line and have my observations done. I slept fitfully last night. The ward is very hot and we had all the windows open and even had fans on. Fans in January. Bonkers. 

I also had quite a bit of pain in my rectum as I think the flexible sigmoidoscopy irritated it so I had to ask for pain relief a couple of times and found myself making a hot water bottle at 4am to help with the spasms. 

So all in all the 'top and tail' wasn't too bad. It's not something I would be in a hurry to repeat but its a necessary evil when you have bowel and belly problems. I should hopefully get some results today so will update you when I know more. 

NB x