Skip to main content

Endless love

To my amazing hubby and my gorgeous kids,

I'm sitting, waiting for my operation. Hopefully this will be the first and last one for this year and me being in hospital will no longer be normal for our family. 

Before they take me down I want you to know that I love you. I love you more than life itself. Everything I do is for you guys. You are my world. 

You have been my reason to keep going, to keep living even when I didn't think I had the strength left in me to last another day. When I felt like giving up, you wouldn't let me. When I cried, you wiped away the tears. You told me to be strong. That this wouldn't be forever. 

Hopefully you were right and today is the beginning of the end. The start of a new chapter in our lives. I hope so because as much as people tell me that I deserve it, so do you. 

This has been hard for you all too. I know that. I know you hate leaving me in hospital as much I hate to see you go. I have been in pain but you have suffered too. This illness may have physically affected me but its taken its toll on all of us. 

That is why I hope and pray that Surgeon A will finally 'fix my tummy', make me better and well enough to come home to you all very soon. Back where I belong. 

Today I kissed you goodbye but I hope it won't be forever.

NB x
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Holiday from hell

My first week in Cornwall was amazing. Me, Hubby and the kids spent the week near Porthleven along with all Hubby’s family in a big house with its own pool and hot tub. The kids had a great time with their cousins, we celebrated Big Girl’s birthday, went to the beach, ate together, played games in the evening and just generally had a wonderful time. It was the holiday I had dared to dream about while I was in hospital amd I couldn’t believe I was well enough to enjoy it. No, I wasn’t able to eat and drink but that was a small price to pay to be making memories with my loved ones. At the end of the week we packed up the car and drove to St Ives where we had booked a fisherman’s cottage one minute from the beach with my parents. My sister and her husband would be staying nearby and Big Girl’s boyfriend and his family were also staying in St Ives at the same time. I’m good friends with his Mum so I was really looking forward to having a great second week with even more of my favourite peo...
Post a Comment
Read more

Disability benefits cuts

So in Rachel Reeves spring statement earlier this week it was confirmed that there will be massive changes to the benefits system including the way that PIP is assessed and changes to the health element of Universal credit.  As someone who is receipt of both PIP and ESA disability benefits I find this whole situation…  🔲 terrifying  🔲 baffling  🔲 rage inducing  🔲 disgusting  🔲 [all of the above] I honestly cannot believe that a LABOUR government is looking to balance the books of the country by taking money from some of the poorest and most vulnerable in our society. This is the sort of thing I would have expected the Tories to do but when I voted Labour I honestly thought that not only would they look after and protect the neediest but they would actually make things in our society better and fairer. How wrong I was. Looks like I’m going to have to get some ‘Fuck Labour’ merch to go along with my ‘Fuck the Tories’ stuff I already own!  Now I do b...
Post a Comment
Read more

Home today?

The antibiotics have finished now and last night my Hickman line was used for the first time. So far it seems to be working fine and if the doctors are happy with it when they do the rounds later this morning I will be able to go home. Today! Yay! Of course I'm excited to perhaps be going home but I'm also relieved as my poor veins have just about had it. I never really have any decent veins in my hands and arms and the few that can be used have been well and truely pricked to death. It's got so bad that I'm now having cannulas put in my feet. And yes, it did hurt.  Hopefully later I will be packing my bag and going home to Hubby and the kids.Unfortunately everyone is at work today so if, no, when I get discharged later I will have to make my own way home. Nottingham has a really good transport system, including a tram stop at the hospital but I don't think I'm up to using public transport today. I'm going to splash out on a cab that will take me door to doo...
Post a Comment
Read more