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Another episode

Good morning. I didn't blog last night because I was so exhausted that by 6pm I was dropping to sleep reading a magazine. I would usually fight it and try to stay awake but I didn't have the fight in me last night so I gave in and got tucked up around 6.30pm. I don't think I was awake for much longer after that. 

So here's my update of what occurred yesterday, which as you will read, is actually quite a lot. 

Tuesday night I didn't get to sleep until 12.30am (so it was technically Wednesday) and then woke up at 4am in pain. The pain lasted a good hour or so but by then I was wide awake and thought that I might as well stay awake for the 6am observations and medication. I have a long lasting, slow release morphine tablet at 6am and 6pm so didn't see the point in drifting off only to be woken up to take it. 

It turned out that they actually didn't bring it until 6.45am so after that I checked my emails, groupon and Facebook and decided to get up. Every morning we have to check our weight and provide a urine sample and everyone in B bay had done that by 7.30am as we were all awake early for some reason. I think if I get time later today I will write a separate post introducing the other members of B bay- if I did it here then this post would be practically an essay!!

As we were all up and awake we all had our showers early. To make it easier for the nurses we made a pile of all our wet towels so they only have to pick up one pile rather than go round to every bed. In hospital it's a bit like when you go on holiday abroad- you leave the wet towels on the floor to be collected when they come to change your bed. 

Anyway Ward Sister came in and told us off for doing that. Apparently it makes it look as though the nurses aren't doing their job by there being a large pile of towels on the floor. Normally we would all go in the shower whilst our beds are being made so the towels get collected as they go round. We tried to explain why we had done it but she wasn't in the mood to be listening. 

The shower room on the bays don't have a window or an extraction fan so when you shower they get steamed up, wet and hot. Very hot. After we've used the shower we prop the door open with a stool to let it cool down for the next person. Well Ward Sister came in and told us off for doing that. Apparently it is a fire door so should remain closed at all times. So are the doors to each of the bays but they are permanently propped open but we decided that given the mood Ward Sister was in that none of us were brave enough to point that out! 

About 10am a porter came up and hovered by my bed. He had come to take me down for my MRI scan. Hooray! I quickly removed all my jewellery and hair slides and anything else metal on my person and off we went. 

The MRI scan is the one that's a very small tunnel that you go in completely. I don't mind it but I can understand why people don't as you literally cannot move once inside and it's also so noisy you have to wear ear defenders. Having only had 3.5 hours of sleep the night before though I found the loud humming noise strangely soothing and I ended up falling asleep. The radiographer had to wake me up when it was finished!

When I got back to the ward I found Mum and Dad sitting in the dayroom. They've come down for a few days to help Hubby out with childcare as he's having a tough time at work and needs to put in some extra hours which of course he can't do if he's leaving on time or early each day to look after the kids. There's also a lot of jobs to be done in the house. He's doing the best he can but there simply aren't enough hours in the day for him. 

At 11am the walking group assembled but 2 new members and we went off for our walk. As we were leaving the ward Ward Sister stopped us and asked where we were going. When we told her we off for a walk she said she didn't think it was a good idea as the doctors would be round soon. 

Now we all knew that on a Wednesday the doctors have an MDT (multi disciplinary team meeting) where the medical doctors sit down with the surgical doctors, the ward sister, the nutrition team and any other specialist consultants to discuss each patient and the plan for their ongoing treatment and who needs to be involved. 

We all knew that they go into this meeting at 9am and are never seen before midday so were confident that we would be back from our walk before the doctors emerged from their meeting. "Well, if you miss the doctor then that will be your own fault then" huffed Sister. Ok we said and off we went. 

Like yesterday the sun was shining and there was a fresh breeze and we all enjoyed getting out and into the fresh air. My parents came with us and one of the newbys was K lady (do you remember her from curtain-gate?) as I'm not one to exclude anyone especially as it hadnt involved me. K lady is very difficult to converse with, usually providing one word answers to any questions you may ask in an attempt to bring her into the conversation but within minutes my Dad was happily chatting away to her about holidays, found out that she had lived in Malta and so they talked animatedly for the duration of the walk. I reckon my Dad could even get Asama Bin Laden chatting about where he was planning on holidaying (if he were still alive, but you get the gist of what I mean and I couldn't think of another terrorist to use in the example!)

The Costa stall today was books. They were nice books but expensive so nobody bought anything (I can hear my husband breathing a sigh of relief!)

When we got back to the ward it was lunchtime and I was happily munching on my chips when I got a pain. I requested some pain relief but it started to get really bad and I knew I was going to have an episode. 

Within minutes I was screaming in pain and rocking on all fours on the bed. The nurses came running and Sister Manager ushered my parents out while they injected me with more medication and fetched the Entinox. I know at the very mention of that word your eyes will have lit up, wondering what I will have shouted out this time. I don't disappoint!

About half an hour into the episode my parents needed to leave but were reassured by Julie that she would look after me and text them when it was over and I was sleeping. Reluctantly they left as they had to collect the kids from school. Not long after they left I insisted Julie sent the promised text as I didn't want my parents to spend all afternoon worrying about me. If they thought I was asleep they would relax and they didn't need to know that I was still in agony breathing in the entinox for dear life. 

Earlier in the day Julie had placed her bets on the racing at Cheltenham with her son, Leon. She had the racing on when I sat bolt upright in bed (this is all according to her as I have no recollection) and started shouting: 

"The 2.40 at Leon. The 2.40 at Leon. Not the 2.30 like you southerns say, but 2.31. That's what us northerners say."

Apparently Julie was also on the phone to her mother and had to reassure her that she hasn't been moved to the crazy ward! I then went on to shout:

"i don't agree with it but I want you to win Julie" a few times. I'm vegetarian so don't agree with horse racing. 

Ward Sister had the idea to alter the position of my legs and so brought the bottom of the bed up meaning that I could put my hot water bottle in a position such that I was pushing against it with my bottom and getting the warming pain relief right where I needed it. 


(The hot water bottle is the cream thing on top of the blue blanket)

The pain subsided after about 2 hours but I didn't fall asleep. Instead I had a craving for something sweet so I had a few of Sue's pick and mix sweets and a Hot cross bun with butter. I wasn't sure how my tummy would cope with it but it looked so delicious that I thought I would give it a go. Turns out it was fine. My eating is slowly improving and each day I'm trying something new and finding that I can tolerate most things. I think the key is to eat small portions and to keep the meals 'wet' either with gravy or ketchup. 

The doctors apparently did their ward round while I was on the gas and air. I have no idea what we discussed but Julie said that they are planning to do the Barium follow through on Friday and that Dr 7 will review the MRI scan when he can get to sit down with a radiographer. 

She also told me that the Charge Nurse  had joked that I didn't bring him any strawberries from the fruit and veg stall when we went for the walk. Now I really like the Charge Nurse and of he had asked me to get him strawberries I would have done it with pleasure. She said that I started to sob, not to cry, but huge, heaving sobs, distraught at the thought I hadn't gotten the Charge Nurse his strawberries. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry" they to me I loudly said over and over. Julie said she had to tell me that she had bought him some just so I would calm down. It's funny old stuff that gas and air. 

But the doctors rounds didn't bring good news for everyone on the ward. Julie was told she was well enough to go home, which naturally she was delighted about, but Sue and I were gutted. As much as you want people to get better and be able to go home to their families and to real life, it's horrible when someone that you've gotten on so well with gets to go home, leaving you behind, still ill and nursing the loss of companion. 

Waking up this morning to her empty bed was a sad reminder that the 3 musketeers is down to 2. 



With an empty bed cones the trepidation of who will be admitted. Will they be normal, a moaner, a snorer, a bathroom hogger, a patient who has millions of relatives crowding round the beds until well past visiting has officially finished? It would be lovely if Sue could move into the bed but then it would leave another patient on their own. There are unwritten rules of patient etiquette based on treating others as you would want to be treated, and leaving another patient alone in a bay would break the rules. 

Looking at the bed board on the wall at the nurses station that lists all the beds on the ward and which patient is in them, it does look like the ward is practically full. I heard the ward coordinator saying she had a male patient to transfer in from another hospital and then I think I that's it. No more room at the inn. So maybe we will be lucky and it stays empty for a while. 

I woke this morning about 6.30am. I had gotten up in the night to request painkillers about 3am and when I went to the loo I found that I'd had an accident. I think that when I'm in a very deep sleep the muscles must relax so much that I lose continence but it doesn't wake me up. I'm a bit like a baby. I'm being weaned onto proper food, not just mashed up, basic tasting titbits and I'm going to have to be trained to not require pads at night. I will get there, I just have to be patient. Hopefully the MRI and Barium tests will provide some answers but there is also a rectal ultrasound that they can do if they require more detailed images of the rectal area and the sphincters. Fingers crossed that we don't have all these tests and draw a blank. 

NB x


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