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Showing posts from May, 2022

Mum guilt

Today has been hard. I woke up this morning at about 10am after sleeping through the night for the first time in 4 weeks. I was in pain though and had such a bad headache I thought my head was going to explode. The one upside to being in hospital is that nothing is expected of you. There’s no chores to do and nothing stopping you from just staying in bed all day. So that’s what I did. Until around 1pm I got a phone call from Big Girl. I thought she was ringing to ask for money for her hairdressers appointment later in the day but instead I was greeted with her crying down the phone.  Between the sobs I managed to make out that she wasn’t feeling very well and that she felt sick. I could tell she was in the bathroom from the echoes and then I could hear her being horribly sick. She was very distressed as she was home alone. Hubby and Big Fella had gone with the rest of Hubby’s family into Nottingham city centre to see the Forest players in the market square celebrate their playoff win a

Hospital update

I’ve been in hospital for over 3 weeks. I came in with mega vomiting, (yes, that’s the medical term 😉) which then progressed to another obstructive episode. Although I’m not experiencing a full bowel obstruction it’s clear that my bowels are really misbehaving and to be honest it’s been pretty awful.  The doctors initially hoped that everything would spontaneously resolve, as it often does, with fairly minimal medical intervention but this time things have really dragged on. So they took the decision to do a CT scan which showed I have inflammation in my J-pouch and the bowel above it (the area I have drawn a red ring around on the picture I nicked from the tinterweb) To understand how bad the inflammation was last week I had a flexible sigmoidoscopy, aka camera up the bum 📸This time the procedure was very painful, despite having 3 times the ‘normal’ dose of sedative. They did see some ulceration of the lining of my bowel which correlates with the findings of the CT scan.  The new ga

Panic stations!!!

This morning I got multiple texts from Big Girl in a panic that she had missed the deadline to register for the next Loughborough Lightning netball academy trials. She’s netball mad and having been in their U17 academy she wants to try out, and hopefully get a place, in the U19 academy when the training starts again in September. Being in hospital I’ve not been checking emails so it was possible that an email had been sent and I hadn’t seen it. I quickly check online on the Loughborough Lightening website and see that it says that registration is now closed.  Oh shit!  Feeling like the worst Mum in the world I fire off emails to all the contacts I have at Loughborough and ring Hubby in tears. He’s convinced that the trials aren’t until September so maybe registration is closed because it’s not open yet? I bloody hope so.  The guilt I feel at maybe having overlooked something so important to Big Girl is overwhelming. I actually feel physically sick. But there’s nothing I can do about it

Just 4 days at home

I was in hospital for a week and got discharged at the end of April, just in time the bank holiday weekend. It was quite a busy few days; on the Friday evening we all went to my niece’s 18th birthday party and the next day it was my other nieces birthday too. On Saturday afternoon Hubby, Big Fella and Hubby’s brother went to the last Forest home game of the season. They’re hoping that they get promoted to the Premiership so these last few matches are all very tense. On the Sunday morning the four of us went for a Wetherspoons breakfast with my parents and my Nan and we had a lovely couple of hours catching up and playing Uno. They all had massive cooked breakfasts but after being in hospital I didn’t want to chance eating anything that would upset my stomach so I made do with a hash brown.  On the Bank Holiday Monday the kids both had plans so we went to Alvaston Castle Country Park with some friends and both our dogs. It felt very strange to be out without the kids but I’m guessing th