Half term began with Bestie, her fiancĂ©e and 4 kids coming to stay for the weekend from Hertfordshire. We had decided not to do much as they arrived Saturday late afternoon and were leaving again on Sunday afternoon as their kids only had a week for half term and still had to go to school on the Monday. So Saturday night there was a huge Dominoes pizza order placed and the older teens were helping themselves to the ‘beer fridge’. That made the evening fun for the adults as we watched them get more and more pissed while protesting that they’d ‘only had a couple’. Luckily there was no vomiting and it did make them sleep whereas normally they’d all be up until stupid o’clock. Sunday consisted of a big fry up, walking the dog, lounging around and the obligatory group photos (we have been taking photos of the kids all together on the bench outside our house since we moved up to Nottingham and one day I will make a montage and chart their growings). Then it was time for them to leave and I always hate that bit.
But the coming week we had planned to decorate the kids bedrooms and my Dad had taken a week off work to help so despite being knackered I had to help to box up Big Fella’s possessions and empty his room so the painting could begin the next morning. The plan was that Hubby and Dad would do the majority of the work but we would also teach the kids that art of decorating so that if they ever manage to move out and get their own place they would have the necessary skills to be able to decorate it themselves. The first problem was that Dad is an early riser and Big Fella barely surfaces before noon so half the work had already been started by the time he woke up and wiped the sleep from his eyes! He did help to wash the walls and woodwork down and my Dad taught him how to gloss. Big girl informed us that she didn’t need to learn as she would ‘get a man in’! She’s definitely a girl after my own heart as that is always my preferred option too. She looked mightily offended when suggested she might not always be able to afford to get a man in as apparently she will be getting a very good, very well paid job. At least Hubby and I will get out in a decent care home if that turns out to be true!
I hate decorating and don’t have much strength in my arms so I was given the job of fetching the supplies from the shops. On the first two days alone I must have made 6 or 7 trips to B&Q as I kept buying the wrong stuff and then needed to return it and get the right stuff. Who knew there were so many different types of paint? Matt paint, silk paint, gloss paint, inside paint, outside paint… and then when you know the type which brand do you go for? The trusty Dulux or the cheaper B&Q’s own brand? 🤯 And once I’d worked out the paint situation there was then the stress of choosing the paint brushes and rollers. Again, do you go for the big brand, Harris, which surely must be superior, or plump for one of the cheaper ones? Will the cheaper paintbrushes leave hairs all over the walls (that did happen to us once) or do we go cheap so we can just throw them away when we’ve finished thus saving the job of cleaning them? Decisions, decisions. To be honest one of the biggest things that puts me off doing stuff in the house, whether it’s just decorating or a big job like having a new bathroom (which is also on the list of things that desperately need doing) is the choosing of stuff. There are so many choices that I panic I will choose the wrong colour, or taps or shower head so I become paralysed by choice and choose nothing. And then nothing gets done.
This is not something that Big Girl suffers with. Maybe because she’s not spending her own money? Maybe because she just knows what she likes and isn’t afraid to voice it. But she decided that the colour she wanted for her feature wall would be one that you had to get mixed and was therefore super expensive. Of course she did. She couldn’t have anything straightforward or ‘off the shelf’. Oh no, no, no. But it does look lovely (don’t tell her I said that!)
The Thursday of the first week Big Girl had a netball training session in Loughborough with some of the Loughborough Lightening/England players. I decided I was well enough to drive her whereas for a journey of this length Hubby would normally do the honours. I’ve found driving really tiring in the past and any more than 25-30 minutes was too much for me. The drive to Loughborough Uni from our house is about 45 minutes so it would be the furthest I had driven in years. What I hadn’t realised though was that part of the route was along the M1 motorway and I didn’t twig onto this face until the sat nav told me to go down the slip road! I had just programmed the post code into the sat nav and was merrily following the instructions until it was time to join the motorway. Now, just to clarify, I’m not frightened of driving on motorways; neither me or anyone that’s been a passenger in my car would describe me as a nervous driver. Aggressive, maybe, a late breaker, definitely, nervous, no. But I hadn’t driven on a motorway in about 7 or 8 years so thus was a big moment. I was well enough to drive all the way to Loughborough and alert enough to use the motorway! Go me!
The following week the kids had eye tests and dentist appointments and Big Girl got her braces on after waiting more than 3.5 years. I also took Big Fella and 3 of his mates to Spring Lakes where they went Paddle Boarding and on the Aqua Park. They had loads of fun but after 2 hours on and in the water they were absolutely frozen. A cheeky McDonald’s on the way home soon warmed them up though!
It’s been amazing to be able to be on ‘Mum duties’ during half term. Over the last 2 years during almost all school holidays I’ve been so unwell I’ve been in bed or in hospital and I’ve not been able to do stuff with the kids. So each evening when I collapsed in bed I was exhausted but bloody grateful to be able to have this quality time with them.
Half term was rounded off with an early birthday celebration for me. Later this month I celebrate my 40th birthday (even though in my head I still feel 17) and had arranged a weekend away with my Hertfordshire mummy friends. We became friends when we had newborns all born around the same time many years ago but this was our first weekend away all together. After the hospital admission in Cornwall it was suggested that I stay close to the hospital in Nottingham so the 5 ladies all travelled up north instead of me traveling to them. We rented Ivy Cottage, just outside of Alfreton in Derbyshire. The first night we did a dash to the local Tesco to get supplies and then spent the evening playing Dobble, Uno and Cards against humanity. On the Saturday it was raining in the morning so we had a potter in a local garden centre (very rock and roll!) and then had lunch and a wander round Matlock Bath. We went out for dinner on Saturday evening at Pesto and I had been given a flashing sash and crown to wear that matched my pink hair perfectly!
The restaurant did Italian small plates, like tapas, and although I’ve not been eating I decided to ‘treat myself’. The food was bloody amazing and the risotto was the best I have ever had. And luckily I didn’t suffer from any ill effects from eating. I even went crazy and ordered a mojito cocktail. But I’ve not drank alcohol for years and after a few sips realised that I was better off on water.
I had honestly had such a great time that I didn’t want the weekend to end. When the time came for the ladies to go home on Sunday morning I cried. And after they drove off I just sat and sobbed. Partly because I was going to miss them all so much but also the relief that I had survived the weekend. I hadn’t been ill, I had been able to do everything I wanted to do and for the first time in ages my health wasn’t front and centre to everything and dominating my decision making.
I’m definitely having less bad days now and on my good days I’m starting to feel like me again. I’m not naive enough to believe that I’m well or that I’m fixed or no longer need to have surgery. But while I’m waiting for a date I might actually be able to have a bit of a life and have some quality time with my family.
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