Flying Visit

I've had a super busy 24 hours. I'm sat on the train on the way back to Nottingham after a flying visit to London via Cheshunt. I had a hospital appointment this afternoon with the pain physiotherapist at UCLH in London so I thought that I might aswell squeeze in a visit to Cheshunt to catch up with my friends. The fact that it was my birthday also meant that it was too much of an opportunity to miss. 

I didn't leave Nottingham until just after 7pm yesterday because there was a meeting at the kids school about the new curriculum and the changes in the way they are assessed. What those kids are expected to know, understand and be able to regurgitate on their SATs exam papers is just ridiculous now. Big Girl is doing maths that I wasn't introduced to until secondary school and that I now have to google to refresh my memory!

After the meeting I rushed home, packed an overnight bag and hooked up before getting a cab to the station. I decided to travel whilst having my TPN so that I didn't have to carry the 2 litre bag in my luggage and didn't have the faff of then having to hook up when I got to Cheshunt. It's not something I like to do because I have a see through wire/tube on view dangling from under my jumper and that can raise a few funny looks as people try to work out what it is and wonder whether I'm a suicide bomber or not!! Plus I'm always paranoid about somebody catching it or pulling it and the Hickman line being yanked out of my chest. Brings tears to my eyes just thinking about how painful that would be. 

I stayed with Bestie last night so her husband came and picked me up from the station. The high winds had caused some trees to fall in Hertfordshire and Sod's law meant it had fallen over train tracks and blocked the route in and out of London. Loads of trains and tubes were being cancelled but luckily mine turned up within minutes of me being on the platform at Tottenham Hale. If I has been just a little bit later then I would have had problems getting out of London. It did present a few problems this morning as there were still no trains running (presumably the tree was still there or had damaged the track) and the other train line I could have used to get into London had a burst water main so that was a no go. Luckily one of my friends offered to drive me to Cockfosters so I could the tube straight in. (Yes, Cockfosters really is a place and yes, it makes me laugh. And no, I don't care that I have a really childish sense of humour. It has the work cock in it, therefore it is funny)

I spent the night with Bestie (and her baby bump) and it was lovely to share the bed with someone who doesn't snore like a pig (naming no names - although we all know it's Hubby) I woke up at the crack of dawn in so much pain that I could barely move and momentarily I wondered how on earth I would make it into London feeling like this. Then I remembered that I had forgotten to take my medication last night and that this was more than likely the reason. Once I had taken my morning pills, had a swig of morphine and got moving I started to feel better. 

It was strange not to be at home with my own family on my birthday but the kids facetimed me and along with my parents sang happy birthday. Hubby leaves for work at the crack of dawn so I wouldn't have seen him anyway but I still missed him. I took my godchildren to school which was nice as it's not something I would ever normally be able to do (because my kids didn't go to the same school as them when we lived down South and I couldn't be in two places at once in the morning!) I then met up with some friends for breakfast at the local golf club clubhouse. It may seem a strange choice in terms of where to meet up but it's right near my kids old school and I would often go in with the other mums for a quick coffee after dropping the kids off. Much better than standing chatting outside in the cold! It was one of the other mums birthday too and they had got us a chocolate birthday cake, complete with candles. After we had blown them out I didn't want to be the only one not eating cake so had a piece. It's not like they would have minded if I had said no- these mums have been by my side throughout all of my illness but I have FOMO (fear of missing out) and eat stuff because everyone else is despite knowing that I probably shouldn't. And guess what? For the rest of the day my tummy was so sore that I wish I hadn't. Maybe rich chocolate cake for breakfast (or any other time) doesn't agree with me!

After a good old natter it was time for me to head off to London to my appointment. I could have sat there all day chatting away! I miss them all so much and a couple of hours didn't seem long enough to catch up with everybody properly but I couldn't risk missing my appointment which was the whole reason that I was down in the first place. 

I was here to see a specialist pain physiotherapist so I expected to be pulled and poked around. But in actual fact she didn't even touch me- we just talked. In some ways I was relieved as I wasn't really in the mood for being proded but in another I was a bit frustrated that I had made the trip down when the appointment could have been carried out over the phone. 

We talked a lot about the LINK programme that I will be starting in January. This is a pain management course that's specifically for ladies with pelvic pain. They run a seperate men only course later in the year but the fact it's only ladies means there will be the opportunity to talk openly about stuff that some women might otherwise feel embarrassed talking about in front of men. The other people on the course may have bowel problems or it could be gynaecological but as it's in the same area we can all relate to the problems and difficulties that we face as a result of our long term chronic pain. At it's core is not allowing the pain to dictate activities or take over completely which is something that's really hard. When I'm not feeling good I just want to curl up and hide away from life. It will also explore goals that we have for improving our quality of life and set homework to carry out in the week following the sessions. Hope it's not loads otherwise I might find myself doing it on the train on the way down. I'm good at doing homework on public transport as most of my school homework was done on the bus on the way to school each day!

I'm really excited about attending this course. Firstly it's a unique course lead by the UK's leading pain management specialists. Secondly it's specific to the pelvic area so there will be no talks of bad backs and how to best lift and carry things! Thirdly there must be people up and down the country that would give their right arm to go on a programmes like this and I have a place. And lastly I'm hoping that it will change my life. I know I'm not going to get any better. I know I'm always going to be in pain. But I don't want the pain to rule my life. 

Before getting the train back to Nottingham I had an hour free and met up with my friend, Kitty at Starbucks in the train station. We met at St Marks so have a unique understanding of each other's life and the problems that we face on a daily basis. As much as family and friends try to understand what it's like for me because Kitty lives it then she understands it all and I don't have to put a brave face on with her and neither does she. We sat chatting, barely coming up for breath but an hour simply wasn't long enough. We could have talked all day about everything and nothing but I had a train to catch and I didn't want to miss it. We said our goodbyes on the platform and arranged to meet again in the new year. 

The train is pretty fast and in less than 2 hours I was back in Nottingham. Dad came to pick me up from the station which saved me the hassle of getting a cab. When I got home the kids had put banners and balloons up and had cards and presents for me. We waited for Hubby to get home then opened everything- I was a very lucky girl and got a new pair of Ugg boots as well as lots of other lovely things. I was well and truly spoilt. My sister was also there and rather than all go out for a meal we had decided just to order a takeaway. I was so pleased that I didn't have to bother getting changed into anything other than my pjs as I was absolutely shattered from having had such a busy day. The dominoes tasted lovely but played havoc with my insides hours later. I don't know why I insist on eating things that I know are not good for me!

I had a really fantastic birthday and managed to spend it with most of the people that I love the most in the world. Having the hospital appointment meant I got to spend time with my Southern friends as well as my family in Nottingham so all in all I couldn't have asked for a better day. I just need to remember to stay away from chocolate cake and dominoes pizza in the future!!