Skip to main content

Why do I do it?

Today I cooked my first ever joint of beef for Sunday dinner and even made Yorkshire puddings to go with it. I think that I'm becoming more obsessed with food as more weeks pass by that all I can eat is only custard and rice. I'm watching all the cookery programmes, pouring over my Good Food magazines and spend ages doing the food shop online. The good news is that I have been able to eat a bit of cheese but still not eggs on their own. Strange given the fact that there's eggs I'm custard. It's soul destroying though to spend ages doing a roast dinner and then sit down at the table with a bowl of rice. 

After dinner I fancied something sweet and started doing my cupboard opening routine. This involves me opening all the cupboard doors in the kitchen, staring at what's inside, closing the doors and leaving empty handed. This afternoon I went as far as sniffing the mince pies in the box, hoping that the smell would quell the yearning I had for something sweet. The custard just isn't hitting the spot. 

Now we are sitting watching Strictly Come Dancing in our pjs as a family. All snuggled up under blankets and duvets whilst outside it's dark and cold. And I'm dosed up to the eyeballs in agony because I foolishly gave in to the need to eat something I shouldn't. 

I had got up to do my usual cupboard opening routine but this time I couldn't resist the Nutella. First I stuck my finger in and had a small taste. I closed the cupboard and went to walk away but couldn't. The chocolate taste hit my tastebuds and tasted like amber necter. The door was opened a second time and the lid came off the Nutella again! This time a biscuit fell into it, and another and another. 



I was relishing my naughty treat, despite the evil eyes Hubby was giving me, until the enjoyment gave way to pain.

I knew I shouldn't have eaten it, I knew it would give me pain but still I couldn't resist. Tonight I was totally weak-willed and I know I will be paying for it for hours despite the pleasure only lasting for minutes. I must try to remember this next time I'm tempted. Maybe Hubby should put locks on the cupboards to stop me from going in them!

NB x
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Holiday from hell

My first week in Cornwall was amazing. Me, Hubby and the kids spent the week near Porthleven along with all Hubby’s family in a big house with its own pool and hot tub. The kids had a great time with their cousins, we celebrated Big Girl’s birthday, went to the beach, ate together, played games in the evening and just generally had a wonderful time. It was the holiday I had dared to dream about while I was in hospital amd I couldn’t believe I was well enough to enjoy it. No, I wasn’t able to eat and drink but that was a small price to pay to be making memories with my loved ones. At the end of the week we packed up the car and drove to St Ives where we had booked a fisherman’s cottage one minute from the beach with my parents. My sister and her husband would be staying nearby and Big Girl’s boyfriend and his family were also staying in St Ives at the same time. I’m good friends with his Mum so I was really looking forward to having a great second week with even more of my favourite peo...
Post a Comment
Read more

Disability benefits cuts

So in Rachel Reeves spring statement earlier this week it was confirmed that there will be massive changes to the benefits system including the way that PIP is assessed and changes to the health element of Universal credit.  As someone who is receipt of both PIP and ESA disability benefits I find this whole situation…  🔲 terrifying  🔲 baffling  🔲 rage inducing  🔲 disgusting  🔲 [all of the above] I honestly cannot believe that a LABOUR government is looking to balance the books of the country by taking money from some of the poorest and most vulnerable in our society. This is the sort of thing I would have expected the Tories to do but when I voted Labour I honestly thought that not only would they look after and protect the neediest but they would actually make things in our society better and fairer. How wrong I was. Looks like I’m going to have to get some ‘Fuck Labour’ merch to go along with my ‘Fuck the Tories’ stuff I already own!  Now I do b...
Post a Comment
Read more

Dexa Scan

The highlight of my day, possibly my week, was leaving the hospital this morning for an appointment at the Treatment Centre, all of a few hundred metres away! I was diagnosed with endometriosis last year after a scan on my bowels picked up an ovarian cyst. For those who don’t know what endometriosis is it’s where tissue similar to the lining of the womb grows in places it shouldn’t. https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/endometriosis/ I didn’t realise I had it because any pain below the waist I always attribute to my bowel problems. The gynaecology consultant said that they would normally carry out a laparoscopy (keyhole surgery) to formally diagnose and see the extent of the endometriosis but because of all my previous bowel surgeries this wasn’t an option. So the decision was made to give me Decaceptyl injections to put me into an early menopause. Doing this stops the womb lining from growing and from contracting when you have a period and therefore helps to reduce the pain. I have the injec...
Post a Comment
Read more