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The Devil’s Armpit

So Covid and sepsis didn’t kill me but this bloody heatwave might…


I have spent lots of time in hospital during the summer months but given that is likely to be the hottest day ever on record then it follows that this is the highest temperature I have ever experienced as an inpatient. 

So let me tell you a little bit about where I’m staying. Firstly, let me begin by telling you with absolute certainty that there is NO AIR CONDITIONING here on the wards at QMC in Nottingham. The ward I’m on is on the top floor of the hospital and as we all know, heat rises. The room I’m in is South West facing meaning that it gets the sun shining directly into it from about 11.30am until it goes down, making it very hot. It’s like trying to sleep in a greenhouse! I’ve been keeping the curtains closed and that helps a little bit but it’s still as hot as the Devil’s armpit. 

The windows on the ward have restricted openings, presumably to stop us from throwing ourselves out of them on bad days, but it also means that the amount of air/breeze we get is also restricted. 

I’m lucky enough to have a fan but at the moment all it’s doing is spreading boiling hot air round the room. 


It was suggested to me that I should put a bowl of ice in front of the fan to cool the air down but there is nowhere in the hospital that patients can get ice. Unless I go down to Costa coffee and order an iced latte without the latte!! But then that would end up being the most expensive cup of ice ever. 

I did try putting a damp towel over the fan but it stopped it from blowing any air out so I took it off. Instead I ended up putting it over my head. I also soaked another towel in cold water and put it over my legs. Doing this did help to cool me down but I was amazed at how quickly the towels dried out so I needed to keep wetting them every 30 minutes. 

⬆️ Not my most glamorous look, but needs must! 

It got to about 2pm and I was really struggling with the heat and feeling dehydrated so I asked if I could have my fluids put up. But the doctor hadn’t prescribed any! So on the hottest day of the year the doctor didn’t think I would need any extra IV fluids! Most people are able to keep hydrated by drinking extra water or other liquids but part of the problem I have with my bowel is that it doesn’t absorb fluids. This is also known as Short Bowel Syndrome. I have to limit my fluid intake to about 500ml a day which is the same amount as a small bottle of coke. If I drink more it just causes me to have terrible, terrible diahorrea which in turn upsets my electrolyte balances and makes me feel even more unwell. Thankfully the doctor was happy to prescribe me an extra litre of saline on top of my usual 2 litres of TPN and once that went up I started to feel a bit better. 

One way I try to eek out my limited oral intake is to have ice lollies. Often they’re only 40-60ml of liquid but I feel like I’m having much more because it takes much longer to suck on an ice lolly than it would to drink such a small amount. So I’ve been getting Hubby to bring me in a box of ice lollies when he comes to visit me on Sundays. We don’t have a patient fridge/freezer like some other wards I’ve stayed on have so we rely on the kitchen staff letting us put our bits in the one on the ward kitchen. Anything that goes in the fridge or freezer has to have our names and room number written on it so that they know who it belongs to. So imagine how annoyed I was when I went yesterday to get an ice lolly out of a brand new box to find there was only 1 left! Somebody had helped themselves to 5 of my ice lollies! This was made worse because the week before I had only managed to have 2 out of a box of 6- I have no idea where the other 4 went! There is clearly an ice lolly thief on the ward! If someone asked I would be more than happy to let them have one but I just couldn’t imagine how someone could just take something that was clearly labelled up as another patients.

To try and keep the ward cooler all the main lights in the corridors are switched off and we have them on ‘night mode’. It’s amazing how much difference this makes but don’t worry, it’s still safe and everyone can still see where they’re going. I feel so sorry for the staff though. I’m lying on my bed in a little pair of shorts and a crop top while the nurses are sweating their tits off in the thickest uniform imaginable. I heard them talking about NHS staff wearing their summer uniform on Jeremy Vine. Now I don’t know which hospitals have summer uniforms (maybe private ones) because every hospital I’ve ever been in they only have one uniform that they have to wear all year round. There has however been much excitement among the nurses at the recent introduction of ‘menopause friendly’ uniform that supposed to be made from thinner material and make them sweat less. It’s amazing how even the youngest nurses are suddenly peri-menopausal! But they’ve been told that this new uniform won’t be ready for at least 2 months. So they’ll probably get them just as winter arrives! 

Looking ahead the rest of the week should be a lot cooler. Under normal circumstances if the temperature were to get up to 28 degrees I would be saying it’s too hot, but after 39/40 degrees it’s going to be much more bearable. 

Last week I had my eyes tested to check there were no fungal spores lodged there that could make me go blind. Luckily everything was ok so now the antifungal medication has been stopped. 

I also had a special MRI scan using an IV contrast dye to check what the veins look like in my chest. This will help the radiologist decide where they can put a new Hickman line as my access is getting more and more difficult. I think they were shocked that they couldn’t get a jugular line in my neck and they’re now worried about whether they’ll be able to get a Hickman in. 

Yesterday they took blood cultures to check that the fungal and bacterial infections are completely gone and once the negative result is back there should be no reason why I can’t get a line, apart from having to wait for a slot to become free. And once a new line is in then I should be able to go home! I’m starting to get a bit tetchy as I have tickets for me and Big Girl to the netball at the Commonwealth games at the start of August and I want to be home and well enough to go to that. We are also due to go on our family holiday mid August and as the days pass by I’m starting to worry that if I have one more setback then the holiday will be off the cards. I just have to hope that I get my new line and get out of here before I pick up any more bugs or have another obstruction. 

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